


Of Tea and Crumbs

by Nanenna



Category: Neko no Ongaeshi | The Cat Returns
Genre: Derogatory Language, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-09-25
Packaged: 2018-10-26 18:49:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10792611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nanenna/pseuds/Nanenna
Summary: A place to collect one shots and prompts.Please note that pairings, warnings, and tags do not apply to every chapter. If there were a way to rate and tag each individual prompt without posting them all separately I gladly would.





	1. Tea Party

**Author's Note:**

> One of the Secret Santa participants this last year didn't get their gift, so as the volunteer replacement Santa I decided to whip up a little something for them. The prompt I chose was "tea party" and I think this came out rather cute.

Tammy absentmindedly brushed bits of bark and sand from her blue dress and white, lace edged apron as she walked away from jungle gym. Oh sure, playing with the other kids on it was a lot of fun, but they had been at the park for a while now and it was a little too crowded, a little too noisy, a little too much for her right now. And besides, that small path leading off behind a clump of trees looked really interesting. Where did it go? What was behind those trees? It looked magical, like it might lead you to a fairy kingdom or on an adventure.

Tammy started down the path, nothing but a streak of bare earth worn in the grass by many passing feet. It wound in and out of the trees she was walking under, the young girl took a moment to look up at the slender branches in admiration when a sound caught her ear. It was the clink of dishes, she was sure of it. But why would anyone have dishes out in the middle of the park? There was the murmur of voices too, Tammy looked in the direction and saw something that took her breath away. Beyond the trees, in the middle of a clearing of green, short grass was one of the park picnic tables. Well, the seats attached to it made it obvious it was one of the park tables, but Tammy had never seen anyone put a table cloth one. At least, not one made of actual cloth. She had seen people put paper or plastic table cloths on picnic tables before, but never a fabric one, and certainly never with a lace edge like her apron. And one of those fancy, embroidered, really long pieces of fabric down the center too. On top of the table and table cloth was a full tea set. There was the pot, the little milk jug, the little pot for sugar, and two tea cups on top of those little tiny plates that go with them, all made of white china with blue swirls all over them. There were even sandwiches and cake on the table, Tammy guessed they were on matching plates but she couldn’t be sure from her vantage point behind the nearest tree as she peaked out at the scene before her. Last of all were the two people sitting at the table, one was a man with bright orange hair wearing a top hat, the other was a woman with dark hair and her back to Tammy.

The young girl dithered behind her tree for a while, unsure whether she should go away or go out and talk to them. She watched as the two people smiled and laughed at each other while sipping from their tea cups or eating the sandwiches. Finally her curiosity was too much and she finally stepped out from between the trees and out into the clearing. The man was the first to see her, he stopped talking and looked right at Tammy. The woman noticed next, turning in her seat to see what had caught the man’s attention. Tammy started towards the pair nervously now that she had both the strangers’ attention. The man opened his mouth to say something, but the woman beat him to it.

“No room!” The woman bellowed loudly, making Tammy smile.

“Ha-Haru?!” The man asked in surprise, though Tammy was too focused on the woman to pay him much mind.

“No room, no room!” The woman repeated, though she was having a hard time holding back a smile.

Tammy stepped up to the woman and shyly looked down at her feet as she asked, “Are you...” 

The woman leaned down closer and waited for Tammy to finish. 

“Are you Alice?” Tammy shyly looked up as she finally finished her question.

The woman sat up and looked Tammy over, “That’s a silly question.”

The man spluttered in scandalized shock, though Tammy was too focused on the woman to notice him at the moment. “You’re not?” Tammy asked with a slight tremor in her voice.

“How can I be Alice when you are?” The woman asked. A smile bloomed across Tammy’s face as the woman continued, “I am who I am and you are who are, conversely I’m not who I’m not and I’m not you so how could I be Alice? I should think you would know who you are.”

Tammy finally spared a glance at the man, he was wearing the right kind of hat but it was the wrong color, and his hair was almost the right color but it was the wrong length, and now that she was close enough to see it his eyes were the right color. She looked back up at the woman, “And he’s the Mad Hatter?”

“Who else could he be but who he is?” The woman smiled down at Tammy, who returned the smile with a wide grin. Before Tammy could say anything else the woman yelled, “Change places!” She got up and ran around the table, yanking the Mad Hatter out of his seat as she ran past him. Tammy ran around the table a few times too, laughing all the while. 

When they settled down Tammy was on one side of the table and the two Wonderlanders were on the other. “If you’re not Alice, who are you? You’re not the Queen of Hearts, right? What’s Wonderland like? Are we in Wonderland? It looks like we haven’t left the park, really. Where’s the Door Mouse and March Hare? You don’t look like you did in the movie. What are you eating? Can I have some?” Tammy reached for the cake still sitting untouched to one side of the tea set.

The Mad Hatter reached forward and pulled the cake away from Tammy, “It would be best to ask your mother before we let you eat anything.”

The woman nudged the Mad Hatter then, but he responded by shaking his head. Tammy pouted, the cake looked really good. “But Mom’s not here, we’re in Wonderland, aren’t we?”

The woman smiled, Tammy still didn’t know who she was, and rested her elbows on the table as she leaned closer to Tammy. “No, we’re not in Wonderland right now. The Mad Hatter and I decided to come here for a change of scenery.”

“Oh, that’s nice. I like this park, it has more swings than the other one by the library.”

“Tammy! Tammy where are you!”

The young girl turned and looked to her left, but only saw more trees. “That’s my Mom, I gotta go.”

The Mad Hatter and woman stood as Tammy slipped down from the picnic bench and headed back towards the jungle gym. “Would you like us to accompany you?” The Mad Hatter asked with concern even as Tammy trotted away from them.

“I’m fine, it was nice meeting you!” Tammy waved as she headed back into the trees.

“It was nice meeting you too!” The woman called to the retreating girl. 

Now that their little intruder was gone, the couple took their seats again as they resumed their meal. Haru struggled to hold back a grin as she looked at Baron, who only raised an eyebrow at his companion.

“Wonderland?”

“You haven’t seen Alice in Wonderland? Or at least read the books? I’m pretty it they was written before you were Created.”

“Be that as it may, it is not easy for me to find copies of books meant to be read by one of my natural stature.”

“Hm...” Haru agreed as she sipped her tea, “Finding books that small would be difficult. But I think it’s about time we caught you up with modern pop culture, we should have a movie night.” Haru paused in thought for a moment before adding, “Or ten.”


	2. Muta's Birthday Bash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few days ago it was Mommbearsdayoff’s birthday (she’s over on Tumblr and has some of the best awful headcanons) so I whipped her up a little birthday present. Enjoy!

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell us it was almost your birthday,” Haru groused as she hefted her purse higher on her shoulder.

“I didn’t want you guys to make a big deal of it, like this right now,” Muta replied gruffly as he motioned to the restaurant the group was standing outside of.

“We promise not to tell the staff it’s your birthday,” Baron said in his most soothing voice. “Trust us, we don’t want them making a fuss any more than you do.”

“And Toto even promised not to start anything,” Haru added. “But that means you better not start anything either.”

Baron gave a start, then dug his phone out of his pocket. “Ah, that’s Louise. She and Sephie are already inside along with Toto.”

The trio turned and started walking the short distance between them and the restaurant’s doors. Muta leaned down as he whispered conspiratorially to Haru, “Isn’t it weird that your boyfriend’s ex is dating your friend’s boyfriend’s mother?”

“Muta,” Haru started in a warning tone. “That’s not polite.”

Muta responded with a pout, “You’re not going to tell me... on my birthday?”

Haru bit back a laugh that was stuck between a snort and a guffaw. “Alright,” she conceded as Baron asked the hostess about their party. “But only because it’s your birthday. It is a little weird, but not as weird for me as it is for Lune or Baron.”

Muta nodded as the waiter led them to their table, not that it was hard to spot with their friends loudly chatting while waiting for the birthday boy to arrive. There were squeals and hugs all around as everyone squeezed into the corner booth.

“We already ordered everyone drinks,” Louise effused as she pushed said drinks towards the new arrivals.

“Thanks!” Haru replied as she picked up her brightly colored drink and took a sip.

“Good evening folks,” a rather chipper waitress said as she approached the table with a wide smile. “My name is Tanya and I’ll be your waitress tonight. I see you all already have your drinks, is tonight a special occasion?”

“It’s his birthday!” Toto said while pointing at Muta.

“Hey birdbrain! You weren’t supposed to say anything.”

“Even on your birthday you can’t come up with a more original insult.”

“Both of you cut it out,” Baron said loudly while putting an arm in between the bickering duo.

“Toto, you promised,” Haru added warningly.

“I didn’t try to start anything,” Toto pouted as he sat back in his seat.

“Don’t worry about it,” Tanya said with a wink at Muta. “We won’t sing happy birthday to you if you don’t want. But that does mean you won’t get the free sundae with your meal.”

Muta looked down at his menu and worried his lip with his teeth.

“Don’t worry about it, Muta.” Baron laid a hand on Muta’s shoulder.

“Easy for you to say, not all of us were born with a trust fund.”

“It’s your birthday, this meal is a gift. Dessert included.”

“Although we’re paying for his drinks,” Louise said to Tanya while pointing at Muta. “Even Baron’s trust fund can only go so far, may as well use mine up too.”

“Horray for trust fund babies!” Muta said enthusiastically.

The rest of the evening went as one would expect, drinks and food were ordered and eaten with gusto, the conversation got louder and more rambunctious as stories were shared and more drinks ordered, phones came out as everyone decided they wanted a selfie with the birthday boy.

It was as Louise was heading back from the restroom that the incident happened, she had to cross the bar area to get from the restroom back to their table and a man heading in the other direction with a drink in hand walked right into Louise. Of course their argument got the attention of everyone at the table and Sephie rushed over to talk Louise down from starting a bar fight.

“C’mon Louise, not in the middle of a restaurant. You never liked that shirt anyway.” Sephie had an arm wrapped around Louise’s shoulders and was trying to pull her away from the unapologetic man.

“Yeah, listen to your mother little girl.”

“Excuse me?!” Sephie asked in hurt shock.

“Are you blind?” Louise asked sarcastically. “Do we look related?”

“What? A pair of lesbos? Why don’t you both try fucking a real man, I bet you’re both dying for some dick and are too uptight to admit it.”

Sephie pushed Louise behind her, but not to keep her from attacking the rude man like everyone assumed. With a thunderous crack Sephie punched the man right in the jaw, causing him to stumble and grab onto the bar for support.

Everyone at the table was shocked while Louise was jumping for joy and hugging Sephie excitedly. Then the guy’s friends ran over to pick him up and defend his honor, Louise was just as ready to defend her own girlfriend’s honor while the rest of their own friends rushed over to try to stop the impending bar fight. Cash was dropped on the table and apologies hastily babbled to the wait staff as everyone hustled Louise and Sephie out of the restaurant and out into the parking lot.

“I’m so sorry to cut your birthday short,” Sephie said as she was crushed between an excited Toto and Louise.

“Are you kidding?” Muta asked giddily, “This is the best birthday ever!”


	3. The Sleeping Beauty

Louise stared up at the thick overgrowth covering the crumbling brick wall. The dark green foliage almost looked serene as it rustled in a gentle breeze, crimson roses nodded their heads in an almost friendly manner, but between the leaves she spotted long, nasty looking thorns. Only a fool would try climbing these walls. 

Louise turned then, and began walking along the walls, being sure to keep a healthy distance between herself and the sharp thorns. It wasn’t long before she came to a massive, decorative, iron gate equally grown over with the thorny roses, even thicker than the walls. Louise stepped closer then, with thick leather gloves on she attempted to push the thorns aside to look through the gate. Her work only earned her a few wicked scratches to her hands. The machete didn’t fare much better, the iron of the gate quickly dulled the blade while it set Louise’s arm numb. Well, others had attempted a full frontal assault and had failed worse than her, if those bones among the rose’s roots were anything to go by.

She sheathed her blade and continued walking along the outer wall, keeping a close eye on it as she went. It was quite late in the day when she found her opening near the rear, a back entrance long forgotten about. The door itself was cracked and splintering with age, thorns choked up the space where part of the door had fallen off, yet part of the door still held. Louise pulled her machete back out and began hacking at the roses around the door, just enough to get at the space the latch used to be and wrench what’s left of the door open. It was a tight squeeze, and the thorns still tore at her ears and clothes, but she managed to make it through with only her dress as a casualty. Ah well, she hadn’t worn her favorite outfit for a reason.

Inside Louise found herself in an overgrown, unkempt garden. Vines trailed over weed covered paths while wilting bushes were choked with more thorny roses. In the corner lay what appeared to be a kitchen boy with a cocoon of thorns growing around him. Louise stepped closer to get a look at him through the roses, his chest rose and fell with shallow breaths, an ear twitched, his tiny nose wrinkled for a moment before smoothing back out. Well, best to let sleeping kittens lie, Louise supposed. 

Through the kitchen door and into the kitchen proper, a kitchen full of soundly sleeping kitchen staff covered in layers of dust. Most seemed to be clutching plates or bowls as they sat or lay sprawled out on the floor. To Louise’s relief the thorns weren’t inside at all, perhaps they just hadn’t made it this far yet. She carefully stepped around or over the kitchen staff as she made her way into the main area of the castle. This would be the hard part, rumors said she should go the highest room of the tallest tower, yet she had no idea how this castle was laid out or where the towers were or even if it had any towers. It’s not like it was easy to look at the blasted thing through the protective layer of thorns, but surely if there had been any towers they would have been visible even from the other side of the wall.

Louise took a deep, calming breath, then immediately sneezed. The dust in this place was atrocious, then again it’s not like there’s been anyone to look after it. Louise pulled out a handkerchief and held it to her face. No choice but to search the whole place, at least it was a small castle. 

It was well past sunset when Louise found the living quarters, and within the largest, most ornate room she finally found what, or rather who, she was looking for. The room had a large, four poster bed complete with curtains. Closed curtains. Louise almost shut the door and moved onto the next room, but she decided to be completely thorough and went to pull the curtains open. Laying on the bed was a beautiful woman with dark gray fur wearing an ornate gown and a dainty tiara upon her head; her hands were folded neatly over her stomach with a single, perfect rose between them. Louise was struck by the strange woman’s beauty and took a moment to admire her.

The moment was ruined by another sneeze. One cannot hold a candle, a handkerchief, and pull back a curtain all at the same time. With a muffled curse Louise wiped at her nose and then angrily shoved the bed’s curtains open, which only made the air dustier and left Louise in a sneezing fit. Once she had calmed down, and also brushed the dust from her fur and clothes, she leaned in to give the woman a chaste kiss. Louise stood back and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

When several minutes had passed and nothing happened, Louise let out a strangled squeal of frustration and made several vague, sweeping gestures with her arms. Surely she didn’t come this far to be thwarted now! Several more deep breaths, this time with handkerchief firmly over her nose, and a few muttered curses later and Louise sat heavily on the edge of the bed, one foot on the floor while the other knee was up so she could properly face the woman. “Oh Sephie, what am I to do? I’ve missed you so.” A wayward tear slid down her cheek as she took hold of the woman’s shoulders and leaned in for a passionate kiss. This time when she sat back the woman moaned and shifted, her eyes fluttered as she tried to focus on Louise. “Sephie!” Louise cried happily before pulling the confused woman into a tight embrace.

“Louise? What… what happened? Where? How did I get to my rooms? What are you doing here? If Sylvester were to find you!”

“Don’t worry about that old codger, it’s been half a century since he banished you here. He’s long dead.”

“What?!”

“Ah, sorry, what a rude way to break the news to you. You fell to a sleep curse, what’s the last thing you remember?”

“I was in the garden, there was a strange rose and I felt I just had to pluck it and… am I wearing my tiara and shoes in bed? I’m not even in bed, I’m just on top of it!”

“I suppose whoever moved you here thought it was more storybook that way.” Louise giggled as she helped Sephie sit up and swing her feet over the edge of the bed.

“Well, I suppose it is more storybook that way, but it certainly is uncomfortable. My feet are positively pinched!” Sephie doffed the shoes with disdain and pulled off her tiara with equal disdain before dropping it on the bed. Then she looked down at her hands as she traced the embroidery of her gown. “Fifty years, you said?”

“Yes, I’m sorry I didn’t wake you sooner, but once Sylvester heard about the curse he decided to make my life even more difficult than he already was to keep me from waking you and running off with you like I promised.”

“I suppose you breaking my curse does make us rather official, no one would dare oppose a fairy tale after all. But Louise, how is… that is… Lune...”

“Alive and well, and about to become a grandfather.”

“How wonderful!” Sephie clapped her hands in delight. “Though I suppose that means I’m about to become a great grandmother.”

“And a lovely great grandmother you are.” Louise leaned in and gave Sephie a sweet kiss on the cheek. “Now, are you ready to run away with me like we promised all those years ago?”

“It only feels like a few weeks for me, but yes. Just let me change into something more practical for running away. Are we going to go visit Lune?”

“Of course, where do you think we’re running to? But it might be best to pack that gown and tiara to take with us, we must make a spectacular entrance when you finally get to meet your daughter-in-law and grandchildren. Oh, you’ll just love Yuki, and she’ll love you.”

“I certainly hope so. Thank you, Louise.” Sephie gave Louise a tender kiss, “I love you.”

“And I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a request, just a little one shot I felt like doing. Another experiment in minimalism, if you will. How much of this story makes sense with only little hints and tidbits? Hopefully it makes enough sense.


	4. Of Rainy Days and Dark Chocolate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy birthday, Catsafari! Have some ambiguous Toto/Muta!

Toto stood leaning against the wall just next to the window, the side of his head leaning against the window frame as the curtain lay limply over him. He idly watched as the rain beat against the window and ran down the glass in little winding rivulets. Without really thinking about it, he heaved a deep sigh that momentarily fogged up the glass.

“That’s the fifth time you’ve sighed in the last half hour.”

Toto simply managed a half hearted shrug before returning his attention to the rain outside. He heard a sigh come from the other side of the room before there was the rustle of paper and the sound of furniture springs groaning in relief followed shortly by the clatter of dishes from the kitchen. Of course he was in the kitchen again, Toto decided to just tune the noise out and returned his attention to the window and the gray, gray, gray sky beyond it. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed but it felt like only an instant later when a heavy hand landed on his shoulder and pulled him bodily away from the window before guiding him toward the couch.

“Here, sit down.” Toto landed heavily on the couch, then nearly toppled over as it sagged under Muta’s added weight. A blanket was tucked around him as he struggled to sit up straight, then a steaming mug of hot cocoa complete with little marshmallows floating in it was thrust into his face.

“Thank you,” Toto managed in surprise as he took the mug. A faint “oof” was huffed out as Muta pulled Toto to lean against him before reaching for his own cocoa, an undeniable concoction topped with whipped cream, chocolate shavings, and those fancy little chocolate straws. Toto suspected there was a layer of marshmallows under the whipped cream too.

“Feeling better?” Muta asked before carefully sipping at his cocoa.

“A little,” Toto conceded, then took the first sip of his own cocoa. Rich and dark, at least it wasn’t that overly sweet instant stuff. He still would have preferred tea but he wasn’t going to say that right this minute. Instead, Toto wiggled down as he settled into Muta’s side and sighed as he went back to watching the rain through the window.

“There you go, sighing again. Is this rain really worth all this...” Muta waved his free hand vaguely as he searched for and gave up on finding the words to express himself.

Toto looked up at Muta, rather hard to do with his head resting against Muta’s shoulder, then down at his mug of cocoa and further down at the blanket tucked around him. “Yeah, it’s worth it.”


End file.
